It will be Cold in the Month of Love...

Literally. Its really freaking cold. They say its normal for the start of the year to be cold but after the warm spell of December up until, well, this Sunday, I would have expected the heat to last till summer. That's climate change for ya.(*cough*startlisteningtoenvironmentlistspeople*cough*)
There are only two kinds of people who won't be affected by the unexpected cold. Those wearing sweaters, and couples. Yeah, single people like me would just have to rough it without the warmth of another...





sweater. Its always warmer if you have two sweaters.

But anyway, seeing it is February, there is some sort of figurative irony for it being cold. Single people get it doubly -physically and emotionally. Don't get me wrong, I'm not being a bleeding heart here being all tear-jerky and stuff. I can take seeing people cuddling and doing whatnot under blankets right in front of me. But being surrounded by that thick, sappy displays of affection all over campus is just not...




conducive to learning.

The universe is inherently balanced, and it will always seek that balance. That's why when its cold, we seek for warmth. I've had my perfect February and a wonderful Valentines day. This year is my balance. And nothing says that better to me than freezing me at night when I sleep thinking and wishing that I can have the warmth of another...




blanket. Yey. Go Climate Change *sarcastic*

It Continues...

Still incredibly effing lazy. I'm losing steam! All I'm looking forward too now are tv shows, movie showings, the ocassional DotA games, free time, break time and more free time where all I do is sit back and wait for the next round of break time comes around after the coming hour of whatever work. Oh well, back to highschool routine I guess. I'm actually glad that I've reached second sem beofre growing lazy again. Small consolation to the fact that I'm starting to do badly in academics. Well, not that badly - yet. Some assignments here and there, not reviewing for a quiz, and generally getting not-too high grades.

You know what, my mother's incessant guilt-tripping on me is actually starting to come through to me. Whenever I ask for permission to go somewhere they always allow me, like this coming sunday's Taal trip, but after that comes a 30-minute discussion about me "doing my responsibilities" and "not letting my graded fall". And now, seeing that my grades are indeed somewhat slipping, I am starting to feel a bit guilty about abusing my parents long leash on me...

Late New Years Resolution: Get grades back up. Need to get into a caffeine induced rush. *slaps self repeatedly*

(Curse blogger problems for delaying this post for a week)

The Muses are eating my Bread of Salt...

Its been 16 days into the new year and I've only to blog now, even if there has been alot already that happened that I can write about. There's Alex's birthday, then our Exposure trip to Haven for Children in Alabang, and then Mon's rockin' debut, but i haven't felt the drive to write them down. I also felt bored and increasingly lazy this past weeks, almost lethargic. I'm sleeping in almost every class, and my hold over responsibility of doing my requirements are starting to slip.

What's coming over me? Is it that DotA has been corrupting my mind to numbness? Has Shakespeare overloaded my simple brain with his genius? What has happened to my mojo?

I know why. I have no more inspiration. No higher purpose to aspire to. No goal worthaiming for. Sure people will say studies, and academics, and my future, and everything else related. But to me that not a goal. Thats a mission, something that has to be done, not something I willingly do for my own satisfaction. There is no passion there that drives me.They say that excellence is 99% perpiration, 1% inspiration (or whatever the percentage it may be), but without that 1%, it will be hell or high water before you can make me perspire.

I'm an idealist, a romantic. And there I'll admit it for the past years my inspiration has been a girl. I'm the personification of the boy in "The Bread of Salt". Everything I did in highschool - yes everything, even unto the first semester of college - has an underlying motive that I can trace, and its all because of a girl. I joined the CAT, I ran for student government office, I embarrassed myself dancing, I stayed nights, woke up early, did work, all in a grand scheme of sorts for that girl. I'd like to quote a phrase in that story but I don't have the book. And if you know the story and what to that boy, you'll know what happened to me and why the turn of the new year has left me uninspired. Nothing about eggyolk things to me though.

I need a higher purpose, a motivation, a burning passion that can give me an impetus to start moving again. I need someone to push me off my ass and make my responsibilities worthwhile. I need someone to think about and take up my free time, because if not, then I'll be just idle and I don't want to think about DotA or Shakespeare or political bull or nothing at all all day
I say Love is the engine of the soul...and Hope is the fuel...
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My thoughts on recent events:
Alex's birthday. Kewl...I love Xanland's rooftop
Exposure trip: It was an nice experience, all that I can say
Mon's Debut: One of the best parties I've been (just goes to show you to how many parties and the quality of the parties I've been to)
Notecards: A piece of Hell on earth
Shakespeare and King Lear: oh God please don't remind me about King Lear...Shakespeare to much of a genius for me.
"Like flies to wanton boys are we to the teachers - they kill us for their sport. They don't want us to enjoy are weekends" - fave quote from Sir Pulan